Dr. Jacoby
Last week was her first session, and it was an interesting experience. I had to control my impulse to correct her when she couldn’t sit still. She popped her knuckles, played with her hair, changed position in her chair a dozen times, complained that her foot itched, flopped her foot around, popped her knuckles some more, pulled off her shoe to scratch her foot so hard I’m surprised she didn’t rip a hole in her sock… I’ve never seen her so agitated.
She didn’t meet the doctor’s eyes very often, but she tried to listen as attentively as she could. She just doesn’t do that very well. She answered questions about our family and her dad’s, and school and her friends - fairly honestly and candidly I might add. That is one thing that keeps me optimistic; the fact that she didn’t pull punches just because I was there. She is pretty much an open book about how she feels. I hope that means she will be easy to help.
The doctor sent us home with some questionnaires to fill out. The Piers-Harris and the Conners’ Rating Scale. They contain questions about how easily she makes friends, whether or not she is easily irritated by other people, feels like crying often, etc… I filled one out and she did two. I was impressed that she answered her questions pretty much in line with how I would have answered them for her. I think she has a fairly accurate read on her own behavior. Another good sign.
In the session she said that the thing she wants to get out of counseling is ‘patience’. This is the word she used. She wants to be more patient with her friends and family, be able to sit still and pay attention in class… I think it translates to being less impulsive and more in control of her thoughts, words and actions. Again, I would agree that this is one of the biggest challenges she has. Her inability to censor her words or control her impulsive actions (interrupting, invading space, etc…) seriously affects her friendships and her relationships with her teachers and other authority figures. It leads to peers that aren’t her friends thinking she’s annoying or just weird and obnoxious. As we all know, Junior High can be one of the worst times of adolescence even for kids with “normal” understanding of the social jungle. For someone with her lack of understanding of what is and is not acceptable, it’s a daily, hellish mine-field of opportunities for self-loathing.
Our next session is Wednesday.
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